11.17.2009

And the hits just keep on coming...

On Sale: 5/25/2010

After the zombie apocalypse, can zombies and human live together in peace and harmony? College professor-cum-zombie Jack Barnes is determined to try in this wonderfully stylish and humorous debut novel.

Contrary to popular belief, not all zombies are created alike. Some of us like to have our brains, and eat them too (not our own, of course!). My name is Jack Barnes, and yes, I am a zombie. But I am NOT one of those garden-variety vacant-eyed undead idiots. After the zombie outbreak, by some miracle, I have retained my sentience. (Sorry for the big word; in my former incarnation, I was a professor of Contemporary American Literature.) I can even write. And I have a Dream-I want to bring peace between zombies and humans.

But I need the help of our creator, Howard Stein, the man responsible for the zombie virus. I've set off on a grueling cross-country journey to plead my case. Along the way I've met more like me, rotting brain-eaters who still possess some sort of cognitive ability. We've banded into a small army who will stop at nothing-well, maybe a few quick cerebrum snacks-to reach our maker.

Let me introduce my wonderfully lively (pun intended!) crew. Meet Guts, an agile, dread-locked boy who can run like the wind. Joan, a matronly nurse adept at re-attaching appendages and securing spilled innards. Annie, a young girl with a fierce quick-draw. And Ros, who can actually speak coherent sentences. Together we are making our way through an eerie new world of roving zombie hunters, empty McMansions, and clogged highways on a quest to attain what all men, women-and yes, zombies-yearn for: equality.

Please, sit back while I tell you my story-a gore-splattered, blood-soaked, sometimes humorous, and surprisingly touching tale that will make you a believer. Are you ready?


Question: If zombies are the new vampires in terms of "what's hot", would you still be crazy about Twilight if Edward had been not just undead, and not just a blood sucker, but a brain eater too?

4 comments:

Shooting Stars Mag said...

Oh, this sounds like a lot of fun, but no, Edward wouldn't work as a zombie. Just wouldn't be the same kind of man.

-lauren

Zombie Girrrl said...

I was never "crazy" about Eddy to begin with (the age difference sorta creeped me out), but I think the story would have been better if Bella had been allured by the sweet fragrance of decomp instead of- what was his scent described as? Oh, yes- sunshine.
This sounds pretty funny! A lot like Breathers: a zombie's lament with the equality slant.

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perla said...

Yikes, the more I think about how great I thought that series was I tend to liken it to having had a crack addiction I was serious about for a short while, then went to rehab for, and how am availble for counseling for other addicts.